Once husband and wife get along with each other, once they have an affair, they can't escape these two "endings".
Sanmao said: "A marriage that cannot stand the test will eventually have an affair."
but even though some marriages have experienced many tests, they are still unable to withstand the insipidity and lose to the freshness.
whether it is mental infidelity or physical infidelity, it is a harm to the family and a betrayal to the lover.
and those marriages that have had an affair can not escape these two "endings" in the end, which is very realistic.
outcome one: divorce
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put it down, it's a kind of self-healing
everyone who has just entered into marriage has dreamed of growing old together with the one he loves.
however, the reality is often more cruel than imagined, not all marriages can go to the end.
when a marriage encounters infidelity and betrayal, the most direct outcome is divorce.
No matter how good the other person is and how he promised at the beginning, from the moment he chooses to deceive you and betray you, he is no longer the lover who shares weal and woe with you and can open his heart, and he is no longer entitled to your best love.
Marriage is based on loyalty and trust. Divorce is not necessarily a bad thing in the face of a marriage in which there is no trust to speak of.
get out of a bad marriage, save yourself, and keep the key in your hands forever.
learn to let go and stop loving each other, then he can no longer hurt you, and you will no longer keep internal friction because of him.
although divorce will have sunk costs, but when it continues, it will be subject to chaos, and there will only be more contradictions and entanglements in the future.
Life is too short to learn to be responsible for yourself. There is no need to lose the rest of your life for someone who is not worth it.
instead of constantly consuming himself in a broken marriage, it is better to break the emotional connection with him and choose to leave chic, which is not a kind of relief and healing for himself.
outcome two: no divorce
the wound heals, but the pain is often
in addition to divorce, there is a common outcome, that is, choose forbearance, not divorce.
but this is not an easy decision, but a helpless move made after a series of desperate struggles.
the reason why many women are miserable is because they want to leave and hesitate to wander, so they feel sorry for themselves in marriage and live in anxiety and doubt every day.
even if the other person returns to the family and the woman chooses to forgive, this marriage can not go back to the past after all.
the rapprochement after the affair is not a real rapprochement, but more out of realistic considerations, for the sake of the children and the family, to maintain a superficial illusion.
the wound seems to be healed, but the pain does not necessarily disappear, and the scars in the heart can never be eliminated.
maybe a casual word, an inconspicuous thing, will instantly be like a thorn, coming out to sting each other.
such a marriage, which exists in name only, is torture and suffering for both of them.
A hurdle that can no longer be believed, and cannot be proved, makes the relationship between the two become more and more estranged.
feelings fade, fate is broken, divorce is a matter of time.
because of a moment of softness, it is easy to forgive. Until the end, the person who suffers from injury is still himself after all.
Marriage is like a shoe. No one knows whether you are happy or not except yourself.
in the face of an affair with your partner, the most important thing is to recognize the reality and be honest with yourself.
when many women encounter this kind of betrayal, they are easy to be trapped by two emotions, one is not reconciled, the other is excessive persistence.
is not reconciled to his own efforts, in exchange for merciless deception, but also persistent in the past happiness, unwilling to accept the cruel reality.
be unable to face yourself honestly and be nervous all day long, so you will sink deeper and deeper in the pain and lose who you are.
only when you calm down and look at marriage, feelings, and each other calmly, can you clearly know what you want in your heart.
whether you choose to divorce or forgive, love yourself, turn your attention to yourself, and replan your future instead of waiting for the other person to give you warmth.
in this process, learn to let go, get rid of dependence, and make yourself peaceful and independent.
Marriage is not the whole of life. Don't torture yourself because of other people's mistakes.
from now on, don't run away, don't complain, don't expect, don't rely on.
all you need to do is to love yourself, start from yourself, and believe that life will get better.